Monthly Archives: December 2003
satu patah kata yg tersembur
rantak satu hati, melayang ke tanah
remuk diri, berantakan…
seperti goresan dalam tersiram hujan
perih, perih, perih dan menebal….
kau tahu? kadang ada sesuatu yang tidak bisa disembuhkan waktu
107248326571526026
blog ini hiatus…
too crushed to write. And I keep the previous entry away. Thank you.
Protected: ………..
Yesterday
Finally got the courage to come out from my nest yesterday and took five minutes train then two minutes walk to catch LOTR, The Return of the King. No single tear dropped as I think I was in a stable mental condition. Unlike Smiegel and Precious from the film. The movie was awesome and judging from how we could always find a moment to be laughed at, even a very sad scene, we came to a conclusion that both of us, me and my cousin, have turned into very cynical persons.
Is it so?
Aside from that raw judgement of us from ourselves, Brindisi is my favorite piece from him, and having good night kisses from someone you love just makes your day.
Now wil you excuse me, I have a saucepan of vegetables soup to look at to and a throbbing splinting awful headache to handle.
Ouch.
TTFN.
She is just her
She is just an ordinary woman who…
….is funny in her way
….is loving in her own ways
….is huggable and cuddly
….was not a lovey dovey person, until lately
….talks to her children in her own way
….very much loves and is loved by my dad
She is always there for me
…….hugs me when I need it the most
…….spanks my butts lovingly when I miss my prayers
…….cooks whatever I wish to eat, not much but she does
…….forced me to eat vegetables
…….taught me math
…….teaches me to always be humble
…….rubs my back
…….braided my hair
…….buys me underwear
…….loves animals and adores nature
…….smells my face even though I just come home from nowhere
Mama is a good friend
……..listens
……..advices
……..talks
……..painfully honest
……..is smart
……..is outgoing
My mom is my world. I simply cannot do anything without her. I attach to her too much in my own way, which I kind of like it.
kissy kissy for mamah from kakak
What is that actually I want?
The presence of you
The physical existance of you
The tangible you
I do not want dream of you
I want the real you
The real you who standing in front of me
Smiling ear to ear with your sparkly eyes
I have you now
But this is not what I want to have
This is not real don’t you think
Like you said before “I want to smell your cheeks right after you wake up”
I want it too
What is that actually I want? The presence of you The physical existan
What is that actually I want?
The presence of you
The physical existance of you
The tangible you
I do not want dream of you
I want the real you
The real you who standing in front of me
Smiling ear to ear with your sparkly eyes
I have you now
But this is not what I want to have
This is not real don’t you think
Like you said before “I want to smell your cheeks right after you wake up”
I want it too
We are not (entirely) our blog
Why in the first place we made accounts in Blogger.com or in Diaryland, or LJ? Because we want something everybody else has, which is online journal? Or because we want to write? Or learn to write? Learn how to create a website? Make friends? Follow the trend?
I have been writing my online journal for over a year now. I was not really sure what was my main reason when I wrote my first entry. I think my first entry was just about my feeling entering a new “virtual” surrounding. My first time becoming a “writer” rather than a reader and an observer. My first time dealing with virtual technical problems, a problem to create nice appearance or layout for a website.
Overwhelmed, you may say.
We put on different personality masks everyday. One different mask for one different occasion, for our society, to casually behave in the middle of crowds, among strangers, friends, even family. No one ever really sure what we really are, how we feel. Trust me. We can be so nice, sweet to someone, but is that the real personality? How can we sure there is no other character saliently be repressed at that time?
People have different roles that make them have to put different way to face others. I cannot be the silent me when I am among group discussion. I cannot be the sloppy me when I have dinner with the respected elders in my extended family.
If even in the real world we cannot show who we are entirely, what make people assume that they can know someone from his/her blog? Why is one’s blog is one’s personality?
One’s personality is way more than a year journal entries or visits and comments in others’ weblog, or her choice of songs and poetry she displays in her blog. There is always be some parts of a person’s life, characters that are chosen not to be exposed to the world. A blog cannot be the only mean to judge the owner’s personality.
It takes more than that. Like a book, a blog is just one’s cover, and it takes more than admiring the layout or reading the entries to really know the someone behind the blog.
Will you sing along?
If I sing a song
Will you sing along
..
Or should I keep singing here by myself?
..
If I tell you I’m strong
will you play along
..
Or would you see I’m as insecure as everybody else..
If I follow along
Does not men I belong
..
Or I keep on feeling different on anybody else?
It’s life
..
If I still sing a song would you sing along
Sing with me or just take it home
Or I’ll just keep singing right here by myself
Dave Mathews Band Feat: the Blue Man.
I have been humming this song over and over again like crazy because I am stressed out after sleeping only for two hours in two days consecutively.
Will you sing with me?
An Attempt to Search Sanity 